niyasisk

Chemistry dot com for Rabbits

Most people think rabbits are indiscriminate about their mate. That they just find another rabbit that smells like the opposite sex and they go to it. Not True.

It took Dakota 4 weekends and 9 female rabbits to find a girl who would take him. He wanted them all of course. But he's never thought through the subtleties of what a healthy relationship consists of. As long as he's dominate, gets nurtured and doted on regularly and has plenty of food around him and lots of opportunity for doing what rabbits do, she could be a battery operated stuffed coyote and he wouldn't know the difference. His mate is bigger than him, more mature, more polite and sensitive than he'll ever be and still he growls at her and runs he off when I'm in the room to make sure he gets all of my attention. He makes narcissism a household word. Of course she still loves him and of course he'll never change. But when I see him protecting her by staying alert and awake as she snores away, I am humbled.

However, this story is about my 3rd rabbit, Molly.

How To Love a Latin Man

A cup of black coffee, can’t find the sugar. Grab the salt shaker used to salt the salmon the night before. But it’s speckled brown. Clearly something is off. Come to think of it, the salmon tasted sweet and cinnamony. But the concoction makes for exotic coffee.

This is what loving a Latin man is like. You grab for one thing you haven’t been able to find, you get something else really good, but you’re not sure it’s what you really need—and you know it won’t last. Eventually, you’ll go back to salt or enroll in Tango for life.

He loves fish, Latin Soccer, Makers Mark Whiskey (the same that his father drank), and he reveres the Latin writer, Borges. His apartment is filled with Catholic kitsch. Little plastic Virgin Mary's staring at you as you pee. His living room? All bed.

How to love a Latin man?
If you, like he, wants dark things: the world of fishes, mute, passive, sensual, take the words “I love you” stick them inside a sock somewhere, enjoy the bed. Hey, it covers the whole living room. That’s a lot of real estate, it must account for something!

He can be talking about the convicts in community theatre reform program or how he loves the nervousness of your lower lip, but he's always seducing. He'll swish each word around like the Whiskey in his mouth. He'll say things that you hear the next day in the light of day that will seem so corny (your hair smells like cinnamon and the dirt that rises from the earth after a good hard rain.”) and TV-ish it will make you laugh out loud.

And you realize that he could be saying, "I used the new silver to scrape out the gunk off the bottom of the spaghetti pot" in your ear in that special way with his eye cocked, wearing those black leather boots and it sounds like "I can't live without you." So...

How to love a Latin man? Tango as much as possible. Enjoy the dance. Don’t fall.

* * *
Excerpt from 'The Steel Episodes' -- MFA Creative Thesis Collection of Linked Stories.

 

The Dating Scene: Is Commodity In and Courting Out?

I had a date the other night…(oh! don’t fall off your chair, I saw that!), who at the end of the evening, after kissing my hand 4 times during dinner, turned to me in the car and said, “So, what do you think about us?”

“Huh?” I said dumbly as I was thinking about racing home to see my very handsome rabbit.

“What do you think about me and you? I believe in getting it all out on the table so that nobody wastes time.” He looked at me intently.

“Uh, um, I don’t think we can conclude our compatibility for the long term after 3 hours. My plan was to go home and if in a couple days I’m still thinking about you, then we should see eachother again.” I said.

“Yeah, I want that feeling, that ‘I can’t wait to talk to you feeling’ you know, that’s important to me. Yeah, what you’re saying sounds fair. But don’t wait too long, I have other potentials I’m dating. I'm looking for a mate. That’s what I want, a mate.”

“I heard Rexall Drugs has a sale on those.” I said.

I’m sure he thought he was getting to know me. He asked me why my relationships in the past failed, who broke up with whom, and what would I like to change about myself in my relationships that doesn’t work. At first, I gave thoughtful answers. ‘Well, there was the guy with A.D.D. I had so much fun with him, but I often couldn’t get to sentence number two without interruption back to his own situation, which he would pontificate on for several minutes. 'Where’s the A.D.D. now I would wonder.’

A different guy a couple weeks ago called me late at night and left a message to ask me out on our first date at my house while I cooked for him.

Is getting to know one another out of fashion?

I realized after the date with this guy, that I probably was supposed to ask him how much money he made, if he had ever been married, does he have any kids, how does he feel about therapy, does he clean his house, does he own or rent, does he plan to be in the area for awhile, what is the worst thing a woman has ever accused him of, and what foods does he like?

Instead, I grazed on sushi and looked for hooks into fascinating subjects like English as a second language, rabbits, the violin, favorite travel experiences in Europe and dreams for the future. Because I believe over time people get to know one another through inspiring conversation, observation and experiences. But that’s just me.

My love affair with my rabbit is still winning out.
I can’t wait to see him all the time.
He’s in a pen, a contained space full of listening.

And, he lets me do all the talking.